My saga so far

I would not, in the ordinary course of event, have thought that I would come to Perth this winter of 2008. When I disembarked for the first time ever, the weather was about three degrees and it was misty all over. How ironic, I thought. It portrayed well the feelings I had exactly when I took the first step on Australian soil and breathe the first breath of Australian air. I was not particularly thrilled, nor was I exceptionally sad. I was, above all else, tired.

Here, I do not live in a mansion, nor do I travel in a convoy of cars. When I was shown the place that I would reside for the rest of my academic year, there were no loud cheers or confetti to give me a joyful welcome. I traveled with the heavy luggage to my room and unpacked within twenty minutes. It was comforting, to know that all my possessions were safe in place, and I had been able to reach this place in one piece. It was an achievement.

First five days here were the most difficult days of my life. I had no internet connection, no one familiar to laugh with, no money and no soul. All I had was my faithful laptop to keep me sane, and I immediately thought I should have postponed and came a week later, when semester officially begins. I felt literally alone, although my days were not filled without companionship.

Thus the days came and went by slowly, as I borrowed a new friend’s wireless to go online once in awhile. I was not sure, what ignited the solemn feeling I have inside but kept reminding myself of the initial decision why I was here. Then I kept my head in place, pulled myself together and forced a smile. Or at least I tried.

Due to the lack of financial resources, I felt an urgent need to email every dancing school I can find online, to scout for a job, offering my services to play the piano for them, something which I was so accustomed to, back in Penang. Although I would have liked a different experience, to change an industry, it was not the right time to start something unfamiliar. Frankly, there were more rejected replies than favorable ones. Eventually on the fifth day, I got a reply from two people. For the first time ever in this place, I was able to smile a sigh of relieve and delight. There was after all, hope.

And today, after three weeks, I am able to sit here and have the peace of mind to write this. More often, when I travel alone in a train, I would observe, without much emotions, many things that until this moment, still seem very new to me.

Sometimes, wondering if I am dreaming this episode, I will look around the train station, of the many people who traveled together with me, but will only see them busy stretching their legs in anticipation of a long journey or simply just smoking, to keep warm.

It would have been sensible, if I had decided to complete my degree locally since it is less costly and nearer to home. But then a decision was made and I guess now, I have to find my own way, somehow. I would very much like to conclude this piece with a more positive tone, but I don’t think I am capable of that at this moment.

Sometimes I think, opportunities are about to open up for a different experience, and I should see this as a blessing. But when there is a blessing, there is always bound to be an attack. Even so, I think I should be prepared for the direction from which it will all come.