Because life can be unfair

The day I took one last glance at my rejected application to locals was the day I sat down and pondered about my future. If you think I am filthy rich to enroll in private college, think again.

Only because you see me walking out from a private college doesn’t mean I drive a Lamborghini when Ferrari breaks down. I am not some rich slacker whose ass never gets whipped by her father. I am not some dumb Barbie whose mind worries only about not getting the latest Gucci handbag or going out with cute Ken. I am not some bloody college student who takes up a course just for the sake of taking it; spending their money as if they grow on trees.

The fact is I am none of those sorts. Not even close.

So, sue me.

I recognize that look of loathe when your shoulder brushes mine. That distant stare you give thinking I am far from your insignificant life and assuming that I am thinking of being so above you and superior to you even.

Muse yourself with the little things that I have and you don’t, the once-in-a-lifetime chance that I have and you don’t, the lucrative job that I have and you don’t, the rich friends that I have and you don’t, the international degree that I will have and you won’t.

Go on and utter these issues in your own bombastic declamatory way. Until you stop comparing and judge me from a distance, you will never see what I don’t have. Parallel to that if you continue envying me, you will see that at the end of the road is a big cipher.

Go ahead. Be desirous. Be yearning. Be resentful.

Better yet, just run home to your mummy who never has to worry about paying your expensive course fees. Or go sight seeing with your beloved grandfather because he is still capable of walking. Study and keep on studying the same syllabus your lecturer repeats with the hope that you will get a government scholarship to go abroad. Wake your sleepy head up on weekends to work knowing that you have to do the same thing again tomorrow.

Despite the spirit of giving this Christmas season, I am not so in a lofty mood to give you the slightest inkling of what I think you already have and I still don’t. So I suggest you stand under the mistletoe and think about it yourself.

Maybe, just maybe, you will realize something sooner this way.