where the world is perfect but i am not

Monday, February 05, 2007

When ballet came back

I had never imagined my life being associated to dancing, what more to ballet.

Since my bike was a four wheeler, I chided over the thought of my mother sending me to ballet lessons. Even when I never knew what ballet was, I refused to compromise negotiations about ballet with my mother. She forced me twice but I was intransigent even at my tender years, so she gave up. After that, I remember learning how to play the scales, arpeggios on piano and never heard of ballet again.

How seasons have changed.

If only I knew I would be playing the piano for a ballet school fifteen years later, I would have gladly learned how to do the arabesque and plies when my mother wanted me to. For heaven’s sake, I might have been able to dance Giselle or Swan Lake already by now! Nonetheless, if I turn out having a sickle foot, knowledge about ballet would only aid me to be a better piano player than I am now. And I have lost that chance because I didn’t listen to my mother.

It seems such a waste now, and such a huge price to pay only for not freaking listening at the right time.

The thing about mothers is they always want what is best for us. How I wish I could have understood that fifteen years ago.

Every weekend when I play for ballet, I would see how they practice their pas de chats or sautés or allegros or grand battements so vigorously. Life as a dancer is not easy I must say. If there is no true passion inside, then it’s really better to not get on the floor. The mentor is the most important person in the room. In my case, she is the best dancer amongst all. I feel great honor to play for her whenever she decides to dance. What a shame to say, I am the only non dancer in the entire school.

Sigh, c’est la vie.

In a world of intellectual pursuits and cerebral interests, it’s good to acknowledge that there are more and more dancers waiting to bloom. Dancing is like an expression of the inner being, the elegance of a soul portrayed through sincere physical movements. It is not about being emotional, but about being able to express emotions. Definitely so, and when you are dancing, you owe nothing to the public, except for a good performance. It is a sense of satisfaction you get and it won’t matter at all when all you are earning is more praise than money.

Instead of thinking what you can get from life, these things add on to life. Just for the record, when you have the chance to learn something new, grab it. You won’t know what you stand to lose. Mothers are very capable humans, don't disobey them. You don't want to regret not listening. Trust me.

7 Comments:

Blogger Alyssa Ng said...

it is great that you could continue your passion in playing the piano with a ballet school. it must have been pretty cool to be able to play for ballerinas and ballerinos and to see them dance tiptoed to the music you play.

how i wish i could have a piano i could play here in Newcastle. my university did not have its own piano which is sad because they don't have their own band or whatsoever.

happy chinese new year in advance to you. =)

9:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

very nice piece...:)

6:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

very nice piece...:)

6:59 PM  
Blogger suYin said...

we wont know how to regret until consciousness actually hits us. no worries. i believe everyone has been thru that.. =)

1:22 AM  
Blogger 毓涵 said...

Ballerinos? lol...i didnt know that word. they don't always dance tiptoed you know. how come when you say it it sounds so cool to be playing for them. lol...thanks arisa go. most of the time i see playing music as a source of entertainment, not as a career. but its not bad i must say.

suyin, yea, i am not alone at regrets i know. its horrible when i actually took fifteen years to realise them.

suresh, thanks. didnt i tell you to ignore your good comments?

2:31 PM  
Blogger Genova said...

playing piano is not too bad afterall. it's still a way of expressing your emotion :)

2:50 AM  
Blogger 毓涵 said...

Playing the piano? Expressing emotions? maybe. but i like modern jazz dance. so much nicer than playing the piano for hours and earn even less than what you need for half the fees for uni. but sigh, nobody said money is easy to find.

1:11 AM  

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