Malaysian checklist
1. A typical young Malaysian can name all the players from a top English Premier League club, but ask him to name one football player from Malaysia, he cannot!
2. When StreamyX come, you complain StreamyX too slow. When Maxis Broadband come, you complain Maxis Broadband always disconnects. When WiMax come, you complain Wimax too expensive. In the end, you say StreamyX still the best lah.
3. When highway toll price increase, you complain. When petrol price increase, you complain. When you go Starbucks buy RM10 coffee, NO COMPLAINTS.
4. When you cannot find parking in a shopping mall and have to walk very far, you complain. When you go inside the shopping mall and there's SALE, run from one end of 1Utama to the other, that one NO COMPLAINT.
5. You are always late. And the excuse you give when you're late is always either: (a) traffic jam (b) no transport or (c) cannot find parking.
6. You have a parent who forces you to take science stream in high school, study engineering in Uni, then when you graduate, they ask you to forget everything you learnt in Uni and do commerce.
7. You know someone who can specially develop an angmoh accent when speaking to an American / British / Australian.
8. You complain against the government in kopitiam, you talk loud loud. Leave anonymous comments on blogs, you also talk loud loud. Attend ceremah by DAP, you shout loud loud. Then when Opposition organise a protest and ask you to go, you dun wan. Scared later kena tangkap by ISA.
9. Every year on the 30th April, you are one of the people below queuing up last minute to submit your tax return at the IRB.
10. When you pay RM10 for something that costs RM1, you blame the Chinese.
11. When a government service is too slow, you blame the Malays.
12. When a building is not good and collapsed, you blame the Indians.
13. When a Chinese student won a scholarship, you say 'Wah! Very clever hor?' When a Malay student won a scholarship, you say 'Aiya! Of course lah! He Malay mah!'
14. When an angmoh stranger kisses you on the cheek to say hello, you very happy. When a Malaysian guy kisses you on the cheek to say hello, you slap him in face.2. When StreamyX come, you complain StreamyX too slow. When Maxis Broadband come, you complain Maxis Broadband always disconnects. When WiMax come, you complain Wimax too expensive. In the end, you say StreamyX still the best lah.
3. When highway toll price increase, you complain. When petrol price increase, you complain. When you go Starbucks buy RM10 coffee, NO COMPLAINTS.
4. When you cannot find parking in a shopping mall and have to walk very far, you complain. When you go inside the shopping mall and there's SALE, run from one end of 1Utama to the other, that one NO COMPLAINT.
5. You are always late. And the excuse you give when you're late is always either: (a) traffic jam (b) no transport or (c) cannot find parking.
6. You have a parent who forces you to take science stream in high school, study engineering in Uni, then when you graduate, they ask you to forget everything you learnt in Uni and do commerce.
7. You know someone who can specially develop an angmoh accent when speaking to an American / British / Australian.
8. You complain against the government in kopitiam, you talk loud loud. Leave anonymous comments on blogs, you also talk loud loud. Attend ceremah by DAP, you shout loud loud. Then when Opposition organise a protest and ask you to go, you dun wan. Scared later kena tangkap by ISA.
9. Every year on the 30th April, you are one of the people below queuing up last minute to submit your tax return at the IRB.
10. When you pay RM10 for something that costs RM1, you blame the Chinese.
11. When a government service is too slow, you blame the Malays.
12. When a building is not good and collapsed, you blame the Indians.
13. When a Chinese student won a scholarship, you say 'Wah! Very clever hor?' When a Malay student won a scholarship, you say 'Aiya! Of course lah! He Malay mah!'
15. Let me add one, your favorite phrase and alltime useful phrase is 'ON THE WAY!'
P/S: Cheers and have a nice weekend ;-)
posted by 毓涵 @ 3:43 PM
12 Comments:
1. Last time i can name all but not now d except MU lo
2. I din said StreamyX is the best but there are still space for improvement
3. I won't go to Starbuck to drink Rm10 because my Mom can BANCUH much more better then Starbuck and i prefer KOPI'O ( and my home can on9 24/7 with bottomless KOPI'O , where can u find this kinda service la )
4. Because inside got air-con
5. You know what, when i'm late to kuliah or Lab the excuse i gave is i OverSlept
6. I always wanted to do engineering but i also like physics
7. Fuck it...i prefer hokkien accent when i speak to Middle East Student because they speak Arab version of English
9. Maybe
11. Government inefficient
12. I blame Engineer
14. I dun mind as long as she is pretty
8/10/13/15 : AGREED
the first four statements are funny and true.the rest are true also but quite lame since they have been overused at least for the past decade and with minor racial referents.but malaysia is multi racial what they say so cincai la kan.
ok.thts lame too.
a good list anyway.u came up with it?
copy from other ehh..
i came across this entry before dunno which blog liao
syafa: am I capable of writing such a list? do I have so much time in the world to create something racial/politically useless/funny but quite true? lol, i only wrote the last one.
thiensing: thanks for answering my question and taking the effort to analyse the checklist.
i just choose a few to answer.
first n foremost, ppl loves to complaint. can u find anyone who dont n is satisfied or grateful with whatever they hav? seems impossible.
i nv complain abt streamyx. the speed is good enough for me. besides, i nv tried others. so no comments.
then, as for the starbucks, i do complaint abt the coffee for being too expensive. i seldom buy their drinks cos i agree wif thien sing too. i can hav a good cup of coffee at home dee, y would i spend a rm 10 for starbucks coffee ? i rather use it to buy fruits.
im rarely late as i like to be punctual. ill be late if i hav to help fetch frens.
parents just wants the best for us, but sometimes they tend to forget n want the best for themselves more.
thats all. =)
bits and bobs from the list.. :)
it's been a long time since i last used streamyx but as far as i am concerned, streamyx works fine.
am not a coffee lover, so not a fan of all this lush coffee rendezvous. saves the money a lot and a lot.
i'm never late for lectures because attendance took 10% of my overall performance results. it's shitty i know..
never like maths or physics, so engineering is out of the question. took law out of liking for languages.
i used to blame government-run offices to be super slow. but then again, it's been almost 3 years since i last did that. will see how much it has changed (if any) when i go home..
and yes, i do speak in weird accent when talking to Whites. it makes conversation easier and understandable. strangely, but true. they tend to know what you are trying to say if you imitate their accent a bit.
overall, am still a malaysian with the pah, mah, lah, ar when hanging around a malaysian.. :P
eve: u seem agreeable to thiensing. i'm sure u wouldn't order plain air suam at coffee shop, because thiensing said its not worth it, at home have lots of plain air suam. what can i say, whats pork to you may be poison to others.
ally: lol, we are both good ol msians. just have different destiny so end up in different places. but guess basically we are all the same though not similar. cheers.
yes u do look like u have so much time in the world to create something.just unsure of the extent of how radical/politically useless/funny but quite true it wud be. and u did the last one?thought that was the lamest. hehe.
abt the accent,have to agree.been tutoring small kids. they taught me to say beda instead of better.u know, enuunnnnnciiiiaaaaattteeeee. they can be annoying.
i'm SOOOO malaysian =D
oh except for number 5
well, as a matter of fact, i never fail to carry my water bottle whenever i go out, be it the cafes or shopping. so, haha... like wat u've expected, i won order plain water outside. unless my water bottle is empty. hehe.
shark: lame lame lame. sigh.
mj: finally someone who is not in denial. high 10 mannn!
eve: yea i try to do that, but everytime i keep forgetting to bring them out for makan. sigh. i should write a note and stick on the gate.
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